Country music was all over the celebrity gossip blogs this week because of the Country Music Association Awards that aired mid-week. It reminded me about how much I both love and hate country music. I know what you’re thinking, there’s so much to hate about country music. Country music is universally the music that people seem to hate the most. But there are certain things to love about it, too.
1) Pop Country. To be honest, this is the only kind of country music that I actually like. And I really only love Rascal Flatts, but I guess I do also appreciate the sounds of Carrie Underwood, even though the girl needs to eat some cheeseburgers. I love that one wouldn’t even know that they were listening to country if it weren’t for the occasional twang of the voice or guitar. I do understand why Rascal Flatts decided to go the country route. Although their voices are gorgeous and I could listen to their songs all day, they are pretty chubby and/or not very attractive. Country music and their fans are generally accepting of the unattractive; case in point: Lyle Lovett.
2) Reba. Her hilarious sitcom aside, I. LOVE. REBA. The thing that I love most about Reba is that she’s a gorgeous 54-year-old woman. Yes, that’s right, 54. It’s very rare that a woman ages well and I think that we can safely say that when a woman in her supposed prime looked like this and now looks like this, she has aged well.
3) Ridiculous Country. I don’t think that I would ever know about such ridiculous country songs like “Honky Tonk Badonkadonk” or “Chicken Fried” without my husband’s penchant for scanning the radio and stopping for minutes upon minutes on country stations to listen to and then mock the lyrics. I will give him one thing, these songs are hilariously awful. If you’d like to learn more about ridiculous country, please just search for the following artists: Trace Adkins, Toby Keith, or Brad Paisley.
4) It’s clean. Unlike a lot of the music that I regularly listen to, I can play country music with my grandma in the car.
5) Country Crossovers. I love that actors, pop stars, and even ballroom dancers think that they can be successful in the country music genre. And they can. Darius Rucker, better known as Hootie of and the Blowfish fame, did recently win New Artist of the Year at the CMA awards this week. And really, it must be so easy to crossover, Jessica Simpson did it. I think that it’s because country music fans are generally accepting. I mean, Jessica wore those mom jeans and people still show up at state fairs to hear her, um, sing?
1) Real Country. As I’ve said earlier, I don’t really like real country music. I can’t stand the twang, the accent, the sequins, the fringe, the hats, and the boots (see below). I think the thing that I hate about real country music the most is that the lyrics, specifically the lyrics that recount how things used to be better back in the day or are better in the country. I dunno about you but I think things are pretty awesome now. We have cell phones, the internet, running water, and civil rights.
2) Taylor Swift. I’ve mentioned on this blog before how much I dislike Taylor Swift. To recap, her music is annoying and she looks like an elfish creature. Well I couldn’t let my love/hate for country music bypass without mentioning it again and this time, I have support in George Strait and Wynonna Judd. I don’t necessarily agree with their sentiments but I appreciate the solidarity. Taylor Swift = hate, hate, hate.
3) Cowboy Boots. If there’s any footwear that I hate more than Uggs and Crocs, it’s cowboy boots. They’re like boots but uglier because of the stitching. And they are an inappropriate size and fall awkwardly on the mid-calf. Furthermore, they aren’t very versatile. Here are the only appropriate places that a person can wear cowboy boots: rodeo, country music concert, Nashville, horseback riding. If you wear them anywhere else, you look stupid and I’m allowed to point and laugh at you.
4) Grand Ole Opry Museum. My husband and I took a road trip this summer and one of our stops was in the land of country music, Nashville, TN. We only had a day there so we chose to do only the most interesting and inexpensive things that we could do. So when we found out that the Grand Ole Opry Museum was free, we were there. When I found out via their website that they had an exhibit dedicated to my Reba, I was very excited. Well, I’m here to tell you that the Grand Ole Opry Museum is a liar. There wasn’t a Reba exhibit and now I officially hate the Grand Ole Opry Museum.
5) Shania Twain. Nothing is more abrasive that the voice of Shania Twain. Except maybe her leopard print outfit in this video. Shania, you don’t impress me much.