This weekend it snowed about 10 inches in Charleston, and if I wasn’t in the Christmas spirit before, I definitely am now. Everything is covered in white and it was that perfect heavy wet snow so there are snowmen and sleds in front of every house on my street. Ten inches isn’t a crazy amount here, but it’s enough to make people stop what they’re doing for a day to collect themselves and dig their cars out. Except for Mondoo, who was halted for more than a day due to monumental fails by the snow plow and electricity. I’m not sure how she fared stuck in her house without power, but I wouldn’t be surprised if completely adapted to pioneer life and swore off anything that isn’t connected with wooden pegs from here on out.
My dad was driving in the terrible snow storm yesterday and got stuck an hour from home after the turnpike shut down leaving thousands of people stranded. He went from hotel to hotel getting turned away, and while I was concerned I couldn’t help but recall another story from right around this time where a Jew couldn’t get a room, and I held out for a miracle of some sort. That miracle did happen and it took the form of a Days Inn about 20 miles out Route 19 in North Beckley with one room left. (He was not amused at my suggestion that there was a manger scene on display at the Beckley courthouse).
I, on the other hand, thoroughly enjoyed the snow and gave myself the day off Saturday to watch Christmas movies and eat sausage. The Muppet Family Christmas is my absolute favorite because it realizes my childhood fantasies of characters from different shows joining in chance, yet meaningful, encounters. I love how they even fit the fraggles in with their own song. This made me think of other classic TV crossovers, and also some crossovers I’d like to see.
The Jetsons Meet the Flintstones: A family from the future and a family from prehistoric times meeting? Absurd! I bet those Jetsons had one taste of mammoth ribs and realized how crappy that futuristic multi-food slice of butter was.
Donna Reed and Dennis the Menace: For the longest time I thought I dreamt this, but I have it on good authority that I did not. First of all, I did not watch either of these shows when they were first running back before the invention of colors, I was a big Nick at Nite fan when I was little. Do they still have Nick at Nite by the way? Anyway, it was this one episode where the Menace family supposedly lived in Donna Reed’s neighborhood. Unfortunately I can’t remember what actually happened in this union so I can only speculate as to the hijinx that ensued when Dennis the Menace infiltrated the Reed household. Possibly a paint spill? A hose indoors? Whatever it was I’m sure that Donna had herself quite mess to clean up.
Mr. T and Alvin and Chipmunks: This was before all the nonsense there is now with the computer animated chipmunks and the “squeekuals,” back when the only movie about the Chipmunks was the one where they rock around the world in a hot air balloon. I loved it when Mr. T would show up and help the chipmunks fight some bullies and give them sage advice. I often wished in elementary school that Mr. T would show up at school and be my best friend, helping me reach the top shelf of my cubby and such. Now I wish that had happened for entirely different reasons—how hilarious would it have been to see giant Mr. T show up in mean Mrs. Bailey’s third grade class next to a 7 year old girl in pigtails scrunched in one of those tiny desks?
Blossom and Fresh Prince: This one is kind of cheating because Will Smith showed up on Blossom as Will Smith, not really in his Fresh Prince capacity. It’s hard to say since he was also Will Smith on Fresh Prince and he was also Fresh Prince the rapper as Will Smith, but since Blossom knew who he was I’m assuming he was there as the Fresh Prince, celebrity, as opposed to Bel-Air resident. I suppose it’s possible that Will Smith was famous enough in his Bel-Air world (what with wearing his prep school jacket inside out and playing b-ball outside of the school all the time) that Blossom might know him from reputation. Whoa!
Here are some imaginary TV crossovers I always wanted to see:
He-Man and GI Joe: In my pretend crossover He-Man and She-ra were top-secret government contracted super spies for the US army.
I Dream of Jeannie and Bewitched: This was more of a public service, I imagine it gets lonely being the only housewife on the block who practices witchcraft.
Go-Bots and Transformers: Ok, so this one wouldn’t be very exciting, what with two sets of robots who turn into things, but it just seemed so natural.