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A New Year means New Year’s Resolutions. Well, for some. Many assert “I don’t do New Year’s Resolutions.” Lazy. And then there’s those people who make New Year’s Resolutions and actually complete them. Overachievers. I prefer the people who set these lofty ideals for themselves and then make no effort at all to complete them. I fall into that category. Here are my standard New Year’s Resolutions that I fail to complete each and every year:
*Call my friends more. Man, I hate talking on the phone. I’m completely ok with email, Facebooking, texting, Gmail chat but talking on the phone is just so… in your face. Friends always call when I’m doing something, too. I like meeting friends for coffee, lunch, or dinner though because then I get to eat AND catch up with them. Bonus.
*Find a church and go regularly. I already missed this past Sunday. So what’s the point now? It was just too snowy and my bed was just too comfortable. One year, I did make it to a church on Easter. A step in the right direction, I suppose. Before the service began, a man dressed in a suit walked to the front of the church and quieted down the crowd. He then asked if there were any first-timers to church that Sunday. For fear that they’d all turn around and pelt me with stones for not being a church-going regular, I kept quiet and didn’t raise my hand. Slowly, a few people began to raise their hands and wouldn’t you know it, the suited man started passing out freshly baked loaves of bread to all newcomers. Dammit! Mr. Mondoo was sure to be upset when he found out that I passed up free bread. Following the service, I returned home and recounted the story thinking that he’s be just as puzzled about people passing out free bread (that kinda stuff only happens in the Bible, right?) but no, he was pissed: “NOOOOO! I love free bread!”
*Work out four to five times a week and try not to snack in between meals or in the evening. Ok, I actually do this one and have been for years. It’s not that hard. Vanity keeps me moving. One of my biggest fears is that a frenemy from high school will see a picture of me on Facebook and say “Man, she got fat!” This, folks, is what drives me to work out. Not a healthy lifestyle, proper nutrition, or a long life. Simple vanity. Whatever works, right?
*Get involved in the community. It took me awhile but I figured this one out. As much as volunteering gave me that warm, fuzzy feeling inside, I could never force myself to spend my cherished free time doing something good for someone else. But you know what? Getting involved with the community is really easy when you’re unemployed. You have all the time in the world and if you want to get out of the house and actually talk to people who aren’t your annoying neighbors, getting involved in the community is the best way to do that. To be honest, I could do even more volunteering but that would severely cut into my TV watching and, c’mon, priorities.
Maybe I’ve got this New Year’s Resolution thing all wrong. Maybe we should all just wish for things instead. Wishing doesn’t involve any action on your part. So, here’s a wish for 2010: I wish blog posts were easier to write because this one was a struggle.