Well friends, the yelling has increased exponentially on EPSN (thanks to Dick Vitale) and Mr. Mondoo has taken a sudden interest in college basketball, this could only mean one thing, March Madness is here!
Back in December, I gave you a preview on the upcoming college bowl season and here I am today, being as equally helpful and giving you some tips on how to fill out your March Madness bracket with Mondoo’s Bracketology. If I were you, I’d pay attention. I straight up defeated Mr. Mondoo in our household college bowl predictions this year. My winnings? A foot massage. I’ve yet to collect. I’m waiting for the last month of my pregnancy when I hear things turn even more uncomfortable.
Are you not involved in a March Madness pool? Oh man, you totally should. Especially with co-workers because not only can you compete for cash in your workplace and for some reason, it’s not considered gambling, but you can also take periodic breaks throughout the day during the tournament and check scores or watch games. Procrastination at its finest.
You know, I’ve always thought that the word “bracketology” seems like a word that I would totally make up. I love to make up words or phrases and see if they catch on in pop culture. They always do. If I wasn’t currently pregnant and chronically suffering from something that I like to call “baby brain” (Definition: baby brain (n) during pregnancy, the act of forgetting anything and everything from the simple to the noteworthy, the inability to focus, and the failure to create successful blog posts) then perhaps I would be able to recall some of these alleged famous catch phrases. I guess you’ll just have to take my word for it.
I digress. As I often do. Without further adieu, here are some tips on how (even if you’re totally not into basketball or sports or gambling) can choose a bracket of winners:
College mascots. Most college mascots scare me, as you know. But today, they are Mondoo’s first strategy in dominating your March Madness pool. If you’re unfamiliar with colleges and universities or even college sports, it may take a little time to investigate the mascot affiliated with the institution. I recommend Wikipedia, so does Michael Scott. How you continue with this strategy is up to you at this point. Do you select the cuter mascot? The less scary mascot? The cooler mascot? Well, it’s up to you! I can’t do all the work.
Colors. Similar to mascots, the color strategy will require some investigation if you’re unfamiliar with the institution, again, use Wikipedia. Select your teams based upon your favorite colors. Or the least offensive color combination. Easy enough. I love colors. And coloring. And this video about how crayons are made (that’s for you, Cowgirl Sarah).
Affiliation. I’ve mentioned this on 141characters before but one of my favorite strategies involves choosing my teams based upon the institution. Did I go there? Did I know someone who went and/or works there? Was this institution located anywhere near me or my family? That’s how I chose my teams the first year that I competed and, by God, it worked! I actually beat Mr. Mondoo. We didn’t wager anything though. We just played for pride. This year, I want to play for pride AND a prize. Preferably an edible prize.
Theft. Oh man, I just noticed that Mr. Mondoo left his bracket precariously placed right out in the open for all little Mondoo’s to see… and steal for her own gain. What a sucker. I’m sure all of you 141characters readers can do the same. Straight up steal someone’s bracket. Just don’t write about it on a blog and they won’t find out.
Utilize the experts. Possibly also considered theft, go to ESPN.com and locate the brackets of several analysts. Investigate their picks for each round and select the most popular pick out of all of them. Sometimes, you don’t end up with the same match-ups, of course, so then this is where I would use one of my back-up strategies listed above. I usually go with affiliation. I utilized this strategy last year and it gave me moderate success. Not enough to win me money though. I may need to find a new pool this year. For the last couple years, I’ve entered a pool run by Mr. Mondoo’s friend. The mother of this friend wins every year. I think I smell a fix. I’m not a fan of nepotism, unless it works in MY favor, of course.
Above all, my biggest bracketology tip is to PAY ATTENTION. I know that basketball is really boring and most people who fill out a bracket are just interested in winning money or competing with a spouse (I know that’s what drives me!) but do your best to listen to the screaming anchors on ESPN, your husband, co-workers, basically anyone who is talking college basketball these days. These people will give you little hints and clues about which teams have a greater chance of winning. For instance, Mr. Mondoo told me last night that a #1 team has never lost in round one of the tournament. So, don’t waste a pick on one of those #16 teams, even though rooting for the underdog is fun. Furthermore, utilize Facebook. Some of my Facebook friends were dumb enough to post their final four picks in a status update. Suckas. You know I’m totally going to consider their picks as I develop my own bracket.
Oh and I forgot to mention. If you use any of my tips when selecting your March Madness bracket and you actually win, you totally owe me a cut of your winnings. Diapers don’t buy themselves, you know.